I walked outside Macy’s at the mall and headed to my car. I started to step off the sidewalk as a sleek, candy apple red Corvette with shiny wheels and dual exhaust drives by me.

I watched the Chevy turn down the 50 yard line parking row and pull into a space midway back and away from the pack of parked cars closest to the store. It made sense because a car like that shouldn’t be near anyone who is going to bang doors or shopping carts into it.

My imagination begins to take over and I see things in slow motion. Bright sunlight is shining directly on the car, like a spotlight on stage. I hear faint dramatic music playing in the background as the door opens.

A jet black combat boot with thick soles steps out onto the ground. As the door opens more, I can see black framed sunglasses and a black leather jacket. The tight white t-shirt slides across the tightly ripped abs as he stands and turns to close the door behind him.

The sunbeam follows him, highlighting the tips of his messy moussed hair as he walks away in tight jeans. Another beam reflects a glare off the silver belt buckle as he locks the doors with the double beep of the remote…

Woah! Wait a minute! Reality check! That never happens!

It’s always a newly retired or middle aged man with white hair and a beer gut going through a mid-life crisis. But yet every time I see that shiny sports car or lifted 4X4, I always imagine the same thing.

I don’t know how many times I’ve been on a dirt ranch or forest road and see a mud covered lifted 4X4 pick-up with KC light across the front. It’s driving right out of a country music video and I think, “Oh wow, my dream guy has arrived.”

Ha! Not even close, it’s more like what would be my dream guy’s father or grandfather.

It works out just fine in the movies. Marty McFly gets the the Toyota 4X4 in “Back to the Future”, Emmet Cullen has a Jeep Wrangler in “Twilight”, Sam Witwicky from “Transformers” has a Camaro aka Bumblebee, The Duke boys had the Dodge Charger,

Michael Knight drove the Pontiac Firebird aka K.I.T.T. Even Lightning McQueen from the animated movie “Cars” is a Corvette.

In real life, the young guys we want to get out of these cars can’t really afford them. Even if one did, he would probably belong to a rich family who would probably have already arranged a marriage with another rich family.

But yet every time, we will think the same thing. Maybe we should make it a rule. Do not look for guys inside cars until you turn 55 years old.

So as the round bald man in the khaki pants walks across the parking lot from his car, I’ll tell myself the fantasy will remain just that.

The car…the man…the myth.