Sometimes it’s just plain awkward working with a member of the opposite sex.

I work closely with a woman who’s married, has a couple of kids, and physically is a knockout. We’ve been working together for more than one year. It’s going well. We have a healthy respect for each other, play off each other’s strengths, and people appreciate the product we produce.

She’s a hard-worker, mature, kind-hearted, fun, funny, and highly-skilled. Did I mention she’s also very cute? It can be a distraction. To keep things clean and professional between us, I more or less treat her like she’s a guy.

Therein likes the problem. She’s not a guy. Sometimes I find myself overcompensating to prove there’s nothing between us.

When we see each other for the first time in after a longish absence, we’ll both smile and say hello. Then because I’m trying to send a message that there’s no hetero boy-girl stuff going on, I’ll purposely not give her a hug. She might make a little frowny face and then I’ll feel compelled to give her a hug. It’s an awkward moment. I’m sure she feels it too.

High five!

If something goes well, I’m inclined to give her a “high-five.” That’s what I’d do with one of my guy buddies. I also find myself calling her by her last name. That’s another guy thing.

I do try to compliment her if she looks particularly attractive. It’s important for women to feel confident and comfortable. But, again, it can be awkward as I try to balance what I say about her appearance with comments about her abilities.

Just having to think this through on a daily basis is somewhat draining.

I worked with a different person years ago. We were part of a work team for seven years. She too was attractive. She was married and I was in a relationship at the time. It was then as it is now. It’s a “hands-off” policy and it worked out great because we’re friends to this day.

I sometimes ask myself if the situation might be different if I thought my coworker was really unattractive. It would probably be easier in some ways.

I’m not complaining really. Work is good. Life is good. It’s a learning process.

I’m learning to work with a highly attractive female. There are worse things.