John was never a sip and go because John was never a date. I turned down his invitation to a school dance when I was 15-years-old.

My high school had a semi-formal school dance called Casaba. It is not named after the melon. It’s a blend of the words “Casa” and “basketball.” “Casa” was part of my high school’s name.

The event is essentially the school’s basketball homecoming and happens every January. The week’s festivities include basketball games and decorating four hallways for each class– freshman, sophomore, junior, and senior.

My sophomore year, I hadn’t thought much about attending the dance. I was more concerned with my work on the yearbook staff and how I could get on the staff of the community newspaper.

My friend Carolyn had been asked to Casaba by our mutual friend Chris. She was excited about going and a couple weeks before the dance, she and I were walking between classes when we passed my fellow yearbook staffer John.

John was a photographer and although we had spent half the school year working diligently, I really didn’t know him well. We had shared some laughs and formed a bond of sorts. You know the bond that forms between people working on unique projects like yearbooks or the high school musical.

John made eye contact with me. Then he handed me a note. And then passed me by without saying a word.

Oh I searched in my boxes of memories to find the note so I could read it again this week as I wrote this article. Alas, I didn’t keep it. I was surprised I didn’t have it. I found my class schedule for sophomore year however.

“Open it,” Carolyn exclaimed impatiently.

I did. John had invited me to Casaba. “Will you go to Casaba with me?”

“Oh my gosh. Are you gonna go? You gotta go,” Carolyn gushed.

I wasn’t so sure.

I had a couple classes left in the day before seeing John during 6th Period. I mulled over this momentous decision. This would be my first school dance where I had a date.

I took John outside during yearbook class at the end of the day and gave him my reply. The reply was no.

“I’m just not ready to date,” I said. I was nervous telling him. I was nervous about the whole thing. Even after reading all those Sweet Valley High and Sweet Dreams romances that nearly always included school dances with boys, I just didn’t want to say yes to John.

John looked at me quizzically and raised one eyebrow. “It’s just a school dance.”

“Yeah but….” My voice trailed off and I had nothing more to say. One of our yearbook classmates walked outside.

“What are you guys doing?” she asked.

“Nothing,” we replied.

My relationship with John didn’t change after I turned down his offer, which was good.