At some point in the last three months or so I became acutely aware that all I had been experiencing in the last three years or so (and especially in the last two years) has been happening for some grand cosmic reason.

Oh how I often wish it wasn’t so. But it is.

The knowledge of this is like when you know that the guy or gal you’re dating or married to isn’t right for you but gosh darn it he or she is better than being alone.

You wish you didn’t know it and you wish you were wrong.

I’ve made tough decisions in the last few years. I slowly eased my way out of a marriage and a workplace. Neither were healthy for me and neither made me happy.

The repercussions of ending those relationships have been rough. I lost security and my already damaged self esteem took another hit as I tried to negotiate my way through new identities. Parts of who I was were gone.

Lately though I’ve been embracing that wickedly wonderful “gift” of intuition that I possess and seeing that this all is SUPPOSED to be happening.

Ridding myself of draining distractions and people has wholly sharpened that gift.

Is my intution perfect? No it’s not. I told my friend Gary that my ESPN (as I call it) has been on fire recently. He said that maybe my intution was indeed in overdrive.

Sip and Go Girl: Yeah but not in a super cool way. I can’t help cops find missing kids. Or tell you to stay off the plane because it will crash.

There was silence for a bit and then the following text message:

Excuse me but that was fucking funny!

We both then laughed hysterically via text message.

So it might not be a gift like that. What I know in general is that I’m growing, learning, meeting amazing people. My whole life is righting itself. Not in a “oh I feel so better” way but in an earth-moving magical OH WOW way.

Oh I knew I was right but I wish I were wrong. I also suspect that it is somehow wrong to be right. It’s so hard to keep up with the awesome things occurring.

It’s certainly inconvenient, at least in the short term. Now, because I have reached my conclusion that this is all happeniing for a reason, I can’t carry on as I once did.

That’s not a reason to feel depressed or daunted.

That’s a reason to feel inspired and determined.

I am already glad I was so brave and so clear… and so correct.

The more I know I’m wrong, the more I know I am right, and the more I see magic. The change in attitude in turn has meant the appearance and recognition of even more magic in my life. I’m just waiting for the next great thing!