My friend and fellow journalist Steve is always busy. Busy. So terribly busy.
I asked him once, “Do you have time to hang around with me?”
“No. Too busy for you.”
I would argue he doesn’t want to stop being busy, even if a genie popped from a bottle and gave him one bazillion dollars.
Look at this person! This person is busy. Crazy busy!
I receive newsletters from life coaches and one such missive recently dropped into my inbox. It addresses this very topic.
Amy Ahlers writes, “It feels like everywhere I turn someone is bragging about how busy they are, rattling off their to-do list with pride [and] almost beaming about how they have no free time, spare time or me time.”
She says busy has become synonymous with value and feeling rushed is the only way to seem important.
My friend Andrew recounts the story of a coworker sent to Asia for a project. Her fellow travelers and coworkers told Andrew this woman did little work and left the tasks to others. But when Andrew asked her, “How was the trip?” she responded in great dramatic tones “Busy! Crazy busy!”
Andrew found this answer so amusing that he would repeatedly ask her about the trip merely so he could hear her flamboyant response.
The tragic joke here is that she felt the need to claim she was “crazy busy” because to not do so would devalue her and make her seem less important. Just like Ahlers suggests.
I’ve only in the last couple months started to fully appreciate time. I like not being in graduate school, holding several jobs with wild and sometimes unpredictable schedules, being married, owning a house. I stopped dating and I love the time it has freed. I follow my calling and work on the Sip and Go Girl media EMPIRE as well as forge a new future for myself.
I don’t see “being busy” as something that makes me feel important. My identity is being found in what I’m creating. It’s not being found in what I’m doing.
I need and crave security and structure however. This means I still set a schedule and keep a color-coded calendar. I thrive on deadlines. Don’t think I’m lying around a pool and drinking mojitos all day. I have big plans and goals with steps to make things happen.
Look at this to-do list! I am busy! Crazy busy!
But as those closest to me can attest to, the last few months have NOT been an easy journey to this point. Changing my life and attitude have created turbulent emotions and feelings for me. Some people are still reeling and hiding.
I’m not endorsing Ahlers because the last time I looked, I wasn’t drawing a paycheck from her. But because her words about busyness resonated for me and what I write about on Sip and Go Girl, I wanted to give her some props.
I did hear her speak during a conference call in which I participated and can at least vouch for her nurturing and direct voice.
Go to the following link for more information about her. http://wakeupcallcoaching.com/
And don’t keep too busy.
